Inside My Head
It’s all too much
I’m too much
I feel too much
It makes me emotionally demanding
I’m way too loud
But when I’m sad I’m far too quiet
I don’t open up enough to him
But I open up way too much for you
I push people away
But desperately want them closer
I think too much about some things
But not nearly enough about others
I try too hard with people
I don’t make enough effort with myself
I am confusing and conflicting
Not just to you but in my head too
I want to scream and shout.
But pray only for silence in my thoughts
I am lonely
I want affection. No wait. I need affection
But not too much because that makes me uncomfortable
I want to be acknowledged and appreciated
But I know I’m useless and a fraud at heart
I want love
But know I am unloveable
How can anyone like me? I don’t even like me.
Is this normal? Or am I overthinking again?
It’s probably me
It’s definitely me.
Because is there’s one thing I’m sure of
The only thing I am completely and totally certain of
It’s that the problem is always me